Site Rating (4)
I loved watching cartoons as a kid, but I find when I revisit my childhood heroes, it's never quite the same. It's was as if something were missing. That is, until I found this website.
Complete review published on 12.05.2017
I've been an avid fan of the Simpsons for many years and have often been slightly frustrated by the lack of hardcore sex scenes featured in the show. I mean, isn't it supposed to be an accurate depiction of modern family life? So where are the throat gagging blow-jobs, the orgies with Marge being gang-banged by Homer's buddies from Moe's. Hell, I'd even settle for Homer and Flanders spitroasting Marge whilst Homer strangles the life out of his good old neighborino simultaneously. Well thankfully you'll find all this and more at Cartoon Valley. For a reasonable monthly rate, they promise nothing but 100% hardcore action featuring your favorite toon girls and heroines. A quick glance at the tour reveals
[v]Content Amount(4)Last updated on September 11, 2018.
Over 76 videos about 7 minutes each (stream only)
DRM: No restrictions
Flash (1470kb/s, 640x480)
Flash (1120kb/s, 860x540)
Over 628 galleries about 10 pictures each
[v]PricesLast updated on September 11, 2018.
$9.95 / one month (recurring)
Once you've logged in you'll see the latest updates lined up vertically for you, with the very latest at the top. This is presented with a title, a few snapshots from the scene, and a lengthy paragraph detailing the action. The scenes are also dated, and impressively it looks like they've been adding a new episode every 2 or 3 days. At the bottom of this you can go back to earlier episodes simply by choosing a different page of updates. There are currently 84 pages worth of content, which is more than enough to trawl through and keep you content for a long time.
If you don't like doing things the long-winded way or already know exactly what you're looking for, you'll find a menu of tags down the right hand side of the page. Simply clicking on one of these it will take you to the relevant scenes. These are as numerous as the different videos on the site, and range from Asterix to anime or Beavis and Butthead to the Silver Surfer. And at the very top of the page you'll also find a helpful horizontal menu bar. Here you can go to the top rated scenes, a handy helpdesk, or by clicking the site's logo you get a sub-menu where you can browse by the type of content; a list that covers everything from comics to flash to picture galleries, movie clips and even games.
It's really difficult to sum up the sheer amount of cartoon smut, both animated and static, that makes up the archives of Cartoon Valley. First off, it can be distinguished by several different mediums alone: Comics, Flash, Galleries, Games, and traditional Animation. And while it is definitely true that all, and I when I say all I mean every, single piece of material here is 100% hardcore, what's offered up can be world's apart in both action and quality. One moment you'll be watching the work of an obvious pro, perhaps even a former Disney employ, then the next the crude flash animation of a witty fan. Likewise you may be browsing your typical Smurf anal gallery one moment only to happen upon a Congo set containing decapitation, demonic possession, and sloppy party bottoms seconds later. You just never know!
In total there are 76 movies and 12 flash animations. Unfortunately, at this time there is no option for direct downloads. They can, however, be streamed via a nifty embedded flash-player. The toons themselves, though, even the more crude works created by obvious rank amateurs, have a magical quality about them. It's as if once you see it in motion a strange warmth surrounds your genitals. This effect is especially pronounced with the higher-end stuff. Of course, I'd be lying if I told you these were flawless recreations of all our childhood pop-art staples. There are the occasional 3-frame nightmares, and many in which the dialogue is either incoherent or non-existent. But who cares? I mean, you get to watch the Silver Surfer fuck someone! That's what it's all about, people. Now, if only I could save these things ....
To be honest, I spent the bulk of my time in the gallery sections of the site. Perhaps the mammoth numbers alone caught me eye. There are 628 galleries already, and that number is growing rapidly. This virtually assures that only hardened toon porn fans with advanced meth habits will have any chance of exhausting these archives — at least not in any reasonable time-frame, anyway. The quality of the artwork varies, of course, and since they don't share a resolutions, it's hard to comment on the images as a whole. I will say that there's a large number of high-res, good-looking drawings here. The overwhelming majority of these drawings are eerily well done to such a degree that I'd put them up against the originals. I tell ya, it really is a trip seeing my childhood heroes involved in bukkake and bestiality.
As far as extras are concerned, they've included some cool cartoon-themed games, and some neat behind-the-scenes videos featuring high-profile artists. You get to see them in action, giving hints and advice about their craft. They also throw in 4 adult graphic novels created by Leandro Comics
If these guys would only implement something beyond streaming video, they'd have a real hit on their hands. I'm telling you, this place will make you feel like you've been reborn. For example, until venturing into the tour page of Cartoon Valley, I had no idea that Jessica Rabbit had a cute bunnyline or that Homer Simpson's ejaculate is the exact same color as his skin. Did you know that Aqua Girl takes it up the ass or that Alladin is afraid of pussy? Me either. And just think, these are just a small portion of the secrets that can be unlocked inside the members area. And with trial membership fees as low as 4.95, how can you possibly pass this one up?
Click here to visit Cartoon Valley