All Wam

There's just something visually appealing about a dirty woman. The messiness, slipperiness, the feeling of caked on mud against healthy, youthful flesh. And there are so many ways to get a girl dirty, too, as evidenced by this site's extensive archive. In addition to the obvious, such as mud-wrestling and food fights, there's more exotic methods like body painting and drywall mud. More interestingly, though, they sometimes avoid the messy part of the euation altogether, and just go with the wet. Think showers, pools, even the ocean. I mean, who doesn't like a wet t-shirt?

As appealing as discussing wet and messy babes is, I'd like to veer off that subject for just a second and talk about navigation. Not nearly as sexy, I know, but I think it's worth talking about here. Namely because the layout at All Wam is so damn good; menus are limited to the bare necessities, the archives are well organized and informative, and, best of all, every update is unaccompanied by a lengthy, well written synopsis and a whole host of technical details.

On that note, these archives date back to early '02, so there's naturally more than a few episodes. In fact, by my count there are, as I write this, 822 scenes and 822 photo galleries. And with new updates being added on a weekly basis, this number will only continue to grow. So, if you're looking for a site that's reliable, you can do a whole hell of a lot worse than a site with a decade long, rock-solid track record.

one of the first things that struck me about the content — aside from how on point with its niche it was — was how well lit and shot everything was. These are clearly top-notch productions. Better still, the newest updates are available in great looking 720p and 1080p HD. There's also an SD options for those with slower connections, which is always nice.

The photo galleries aren't too shabby, either. On average you can expect 100 clear and crisp images, available for you to browse on-site, or, if you'd prefer, to download — in their entirety — in a ZIP file. The latest offerings are ultra high-res and, I must say, positively breathtaking. Particularly the shots of slime and grime in motion.

I was also quite pleased to find that they've stocked their stable with exceptionally beautiful models. Ideal for these messy shoots, if you ask me. Yes, for my money, a fetish like this is all about contrast. And is it not all the more visually compelling if it's a drop-dead-gorgeous person being covered in the muck? I find it really accentuates the grime — and the thrill — when you can see a glint of perfection just beneath the surface.

Another big plus is that there's a lot of community features going on. Users can rate specific episodes and models, interact via private messages and by adding people to their "friend's list." And there's also a profile page where you and other members can post messages to your own personal wall.

This site isn't perfect, however, and one of the first issues that really grabs me is über low quality of the older content. This is only naturally on a site over a decade old, but it's still a pitfall.

Also, the language barrier is a serious problem here. I was watching a quasi waterboarding scene, for instance, where an serious looking blonde MILF interrogates a brunette teen by holding her down in a tub and pouring buckets of water over her face. This scene would have been much hotter if only I could have understood the teen's obvious pleas, or the MILF's obvious demands. It might not sound like a big deal, but it happens often enough that, for me at least, it is. So, I'm begging: please, at the very least, add subtitles.

One issue that's less avoidable, however, is the ill placement of that eye-sore of an ad on the home page. A page which is, by the way, otherwise immaculate. Why, it's practically a sin.

But wash your mind of all that sacrilege business. I mean, it hardly matters when you get access to 18 additional sites courtesy of the Tainster Network. I highly recommend Spunk Party and Slime Wave. Hell, they fit they theme damn well, don't they?